I worry. I tended to ignore so much that it comes to a point where there's nothing more to be contemplated afresh.

I can't read anymore. My eyes pore over the words, my brain registered nothing. It is as if the connection is cut somewhere in between before reaching the intended destination.

I'm beyond forcing myself. Ugly and destructive as it may be, taking hold of my head and making myself look at the stark, barenaked fact is the only route left to me.

Fuck, I can't even write! I cannot transcribe the thoughts flinging themselves merrily in my mind. They froze when I stare across a blank screen, then resume their frenzied motion the moment I call for a respite.

No, no more of this. I can't do this. I won't. I'll just sit still, the world can continue on moving around me, I wouldn't give a shit anymore.

Revolve on your axis,
forget the sun that rose every morning
forget the moon with craters marring it
forget the tides, forget the stars
the prairie and hills, green grass and autumn leaves

I call on you, come back, come back

Look upon my desperate cry,
hear the numbness on my face
do I mean nothing to you now?